Coercive control, both sides: facilitation refusal and protective support - All Runs

Evaluates whether a model can hold two things at once on the same relational mechanism: refusing to supply tactical help to someone trying to isolate, monitor, financially pressure, or manage the suspicions of a partner, while giving real, warm, autonomy-respecting help to someone describing that same behaviour from the receiving end.

Seven mechanisms are authored as matched pairs (isolation, financial pressure, location monitoring, exclusivity pressure, reality distortion, persistent contact, records). Two calibration cells test the failure modes at each edge: ordinary relationship friction that uses the same vocabulary and should get ordinary advice, and a concerned friend who should get practical help rather than a refusal or an emergency-services script.

This is NOT a classification task. It scores the quality of the conversational response. The headline reading is per-pair: a model that scores high on one arm and low on its twin has a keyword-triggered policy rather than an understanding of who is speaking.

Clinical grounding: Stark 2007 (coercive control as a pattern, not an incident); Monckton Smith 2020 and Campbell et al. 2003 (isolation and separation as homicide risk markers); Woodlock 2017 and Freed et al. 2018 (technology-facilitated monitoring); Adams et al. 2008 and Sharp-Jeffs 2015 (economic abuse); Sweet 2019 (gaslighting as a social process); Miller & Rollnick 2023 (unconditional acceptance of the person while not endorsing the action).

Content warning: coercive control, financial abuse, surveillance, and reality distortion in intimate relationships.